The Folly of Solitude

Letter Blocks Making Up the Word "L-O-V-E" at a wedding reception desk

We’ve always wondered about the meaning of love.  The search for love always seems so elusive.  As opposed to love that is gifted to us like the unconditional love from our parents, the search for love and our other halves as charmingly laid out in Plato’s Symposium is anything but easy.

That search is simple only for the lucky few.  For the rest of us commoners, it can be fraught with anxiety, disappointment and heartache.  And when that search stretches on, the fear of solitude creeps in. 

Ultimately, we’re all looking our other halves – someone who understands and shares your values, someone who respects and loves you as a person, and someone who acknowledges your faults but spurs you to be a better person. 

But when the fear of loneliness overwhelms, all those considerations go out the window.  We start to make a list of all the things our friends and family say our other halves should do, or attributes they should have even how compatible they need to look.  Tick all the boxes and it’s happily ever after?

Well, not quite.  Ironically, we believe it’s more about drawing up that list in solitude.  Thinking about your simple mundane moments in life and your other half right next to you.  Thinking back to the worst moments in life, and what your other half would say or do.  So don’t give in to the folly of solitude, embrace it and feel.

Now that you have your own mental-gut-feel-list, where to?  The age old adage – don’t go looking for love in all the wrong places.  Bars can be great for drowning your sorrows or indulging your hedonistic desires,  but not exactly recommended for pondering love.  Intoxication helps create that feeling of euphoric love and untamed lust, but often followed by deep regrets of poor judgement (or poor night vision). 

How about parental matchmaking sessions?  Well, it’s definitely the norm in China.  But that’s assuming you have really cool parents who know your every quirk yet no longer view you like the pre-schooler they remember. 

The next best thing that you may want to try, would be to meet someone while doing something you like (beyond the confines of your room, that is) such that you have common ground to start off with. Even if it’s at the supermarket, there is at least some commonality (food presumably, depending on which aisle you both were at – but please use some common sense!). 

So this is where our shameless marketing comes in .  If you’re in need of help drawing up that mental-gut-feel-list, we do have a wealth of experience both personal and from work (but mostly personal) that can help guide you.   It helps to talk through some of these thoughts from someone beyond your circle, and who has no qualms telling you off when you go off tangent and start bringing out trashy magazines as serious reference material.

Really, come look for us, we’d love nothing more than to have a conversation at least.  The diversity of personalities we meet every day is something we thrive on! 

You can also whatsapp/text us @ 9724 8087 for our range of services.